LOST-- A Poem

Stuck at crossroads

Unsure

To turn left?

To turn right?

To move forward?

Or take backward steps?

No one to ask

No one to help

Despair

All alone

Stomach lurching

Sweating bullets

Unable to return

No memory of start point

Confusion

Eyes darting

How did you get here?

No knowledge of how to advance

Lost?

Too many mistakes made?

Focus.

Acknowledge your mistakes

Advance

There's no room for you in the land of the lost.

-A

Knots

Hi guys!
         How's everyone doing today? I hope you all had a good week. If you were wondering, it was a good one for me too, well mostly. And as usual, the weekend has been the best part. But I'm still going to tell you guys about my week though, so fear not. Well, Hardest part :Knot tying. I started doing topographic anatomy this semester (some universities call it ''surgical techniques'') and all had been great until I met the knot tying part. I mean your girl can even suture (partially) but I can't seem to tie the ''ropes'' the way surgeons are supposed to. Take note, I CAN tie them, just not like a surgeon should, that is, with minimal contact with the body of the patient. It was pretty frustrating. And I'm still working on it. It led me to thinking about knots.. a lot. All kinds of knots, literal and figurative. You know like how your stomach can be in knots when you're nervous or how you can tie yourself in knots when you tangle with the wrong kind of people? Yup. My conclusion? Good things hardly ever come out of knots, HARDLY. Except the fact that knotting keeps sutured wounds closed.
          Best part : Friday! My Fridays are the best to be honest. I get to learn pediatrics in a children's hospital and I close the earliest AND get to see friends in the evening after a stressful week. This Friday was extra cool. Spent time getting to know my new group mates and I dare say we had a ball. There were quite a few clashes based on the different perspectives of the male and female species on relationships and love. It was quite an intellectual conversation. We started a French group in my congregation this week and I'm very excited to be a part of it. I'm trying to bring my French back as my brain seems to have been taken over by Russian. Safe to say I've got a lot on my plate and surprisingly, I quite like it. I love a good challenge. I may be practicing some of my French with you guys too. I'm trying to stay in the multilingual state of mind. ;). I plan to spend the rest of my weekend cooking, eating, practicing my knot tying, studying and resting. Basically try to be as productive as possible and be ready for the new week.
          I took a few pictures when I went thrift shopping today and during the week, with my phone too. Nothing too fancy.

Group mates

Group mates + me

Neon heels. (which I didn't buy)

Sunshine today. Spring is coming people!

      Don't panic just yet, there's a lesson for the week ''practice makes perfect'' (or almost), knot tying or not, no pun intended. I'll try and try again. Prayer helps too.

      Thanks to all who stop by and comment and follow. And thanks to my mum who reads EVERY single article and tells me whether or not she likes them. Have a great week guys! xx

       

Fear

  Hearts that feel squeezed in the chest,

With moisture filling the palms of their hands.

Feeling out of breath.

And feet that are losing their grip on land.

Paralyzed minds

Unable to think clearly

Thoughts entwined

But no words, sadly

Those afraid to dream

Those afraid to fly

Afraid to be under their own steam

They lay in bed and sigh

Too scared to love

Too scared to trust

Too scared to show they love

Too scared to show they trust

Terrified of failure

No balls to face reality

Too much fright to be sure

Of your own ability

Afraid of all the wrong things

Unaware of the right fear

Which with wisdom 

Is in the same kingdom

Everything else can be conquered

With a little faith

And some trust

And some love.

    

      -A

Staying True

Hellooo!

     It's a good day for me today! It's been such  a great weekend so far and I'm more grateful for the kind of friends I have who make me happy and cheer me up every time. My week though, was good. It wasn't great, but good. I felt irritable most of the time and my steadfast Sony Ericsson phone died. She was a year and one month old. Cause of death: Trauma from a fall down two storeys (apparently, according to microsoft ''storeys'' isn't a real word *shrugs*). Anyway, that's by the way. School this week felt really hectic and I don't know why, it felt like longer hours but I felt like everything was just happening really quickly at the same time. Like I'd have an 8am class and before I knew it would be 7pm and I'd be studying for my test the next day. Let's just say I really appreciated the whole TGIF mantra this week.
   This week I learned an important lesson about staying true to yourself. By staying true to yourself, I don't mean that you shouldn't try to change bad habits or make yourself a better person or learn from the advice of others. I mean that whatever the circumstances are, remain cheerful and nice to people. Even if you're having a bad day, or you're broke or hungry (this is for me), try not to treat people differently from how you would've treated them if you were in a superb mood. Don't let one person determine how you treat others. If someone is rude to you all the time or picks on you, it doesn't mean you should be rude to other people or even to that person (if you can manage). It's cliche but true. Rise above it. If you're too angry to be nice to the person immediately after he offends you, be nice to other people. Stay true to you. Be the great friend you've always been, be the good student you've always been, be the polite coworker you've always been. Do not let anyone take control over your your emotions and reactions because at the end of the day, YOU will lose friends and ruin your good reputation. 
   Guess who took some photos this week? Me. Here are some of my favorites.

Christina

:)

Photo by Christina

You can guess who my muse was today ;)

       I plan to have a great Sunday as well. The motto for this weekend is: ''Be productive''. I hope you all have a productive weekend where you stay true to your fab selves! Thank you for stopping by! And leave comments or follow the blog once in a while ;) xx

    

Love A Little

Reeling from disappointment

Crushed by betrayal

Broken by loss

No tears left to cry

Rising from the ashes

Building walls even higher

Walls without a gate

No door, window or even a crack

Closing up from touch

Like a delicate mimosa flower

Fleeing from attachment

An island terrified of hurt

It's time to live again

Throw caution to the wind

Try a little, Trust a little
  Love a little

-A            

                               

P.S Song of the day: Kaci-I will learn to love again (So appropriate right? )

Nigeria Goes GOLD!!

HAYYYYY! 

     *composes self* Hi guys!

    Nigeria won the African Cup of Nations!!! I'm so impressed by this feat. As we all know, we've had quite a difficult time winning any trophies for a while, so this was very welcome good news. I decided to take a break from the usual writing and do a hats off to Nigeria by giving a recap of the highlights. Not the actual pitch highlights of course. I mean I watch football, but I'm not the best person to talk about it, I'd probably just make some kind of blunder. I'm giving y'all HIGHLIGHTS FROM TWITTER. Prepare to be very amused. 

      The Nigerian community on Twitter was very excited about this match you know, although we spent the first few minutes arguing about  what people from Burkina Faso are called. 

      We never quite figured it out, so if you have any ideas, let me know in the comments below. We also talked a lot about the Burkina players (I don't know how to call them yet *shrugs*), ESPECIALLY BANCE, you know the really dark guy with indomie hair? or was it french fries. Let's see what my Twitter folks said.

Well, what can I say? Nigerians are really funny people.

There were also funny speculations as to all the mixed chances and people had a lot of funny images about what the Burkina people had done to make our dear Musa fall like a leaf in autumn. This was one of them.

Ohh and when that Nigerian pushed the Burkina guy? Don't mess with Nigerians.

And at the end of the day, I felt more sorry for Ghanaians than Nigerians. I still don't understand why they try to quarrel with Nigerians, the average Nigerian can insult 5 people at once and be unnerved. And at the end of the day?

So Burkina lost. Poor Bance had to cry and still no pity for him. More insults. Proof?

CONGRATULATIONS SUPER EAGLES!!!! Enjoy your victory! Cheers!

Grateful

   Hi guys!

        How did your week go? Better than mine I hope. School went quite well this week. The highlight of my week was definitely my microbiology teacher. Very amusing fellow. In his early 70's, I think. Everything reminds him of an experience he's had, that's the beautiful thing about being old- you've seen it all. He is quite well traveled and funny in an old mischievous kinda way. Honestly was riveted by his lectures, although I admit I spent a few minutes calculating his age after he said that he had graduated from our university in 1964. My first therapy class was also really good. I learnt such a huge amount of stuff about how a hospital works and general protocol. Proper learning will commence next week though, so I wasted a lot of precious time this week and time did seem to fly by with all the 8am to 4:25pm classes. But, so far, so good.

       This week was also really sad for me. Two people I care about died. One of them was a young woman who had been married four years at most. She had two children, one of whom is a three month old. She was diagnosed with a brain tumor after she had her second child. And she died at the end of January. I know a lot people say stuff like this, but I saw this woman, pregnant and healthy this past summer, she rode in our car once while I was home and she visited my family with her husband who will now care for their two children. I can still hear her laugh. How is she now buried, six feet deep somewhere? After my mum told me about her death, I couldn't stop thinking of just how fleeting life is. I believe in the hope of a resurrection as written in the bible, but it still hurts now anyway and I cannot imagine how her husband, parents and siblings are coping.

         So, I am GRATEFUL. This raises other feelings though. I feel guilty. Guilty that I live and breathe, and eat and hear the voices of those I love and guilty that I can hear good music. Guilty that my entire family, my parents, brother and extended family are alive and well. Is this what survivors guilt is? I'm stuck. I'm stuck in this place between thankfulness and guilt and I'm hoping I get out soon. So I can live and breathe and actually live. So I believe that this life isn't all there is. It can not be. I'm waiting for the real life the bible promises. I don't want to leave on a sad note people, so let's make something good out of this and remember to thank our maker everyday for all the mundane things we take for granted- life, waking up, sight, taste, family, health, money, everything-, constantly remind our loved ones how much we love them  and lets us pray that He strengthens all who don't have all those liberties. Remember not to weep as those who have no hope- 1st Thessalonians 4:13.

         Thanks for stopping by and don't forget to leave your comments, I'd love to know what you think! Have a fab week xx
P.S My song of the week Colton Dixon- I'll Be the light (Its Amaaazing)

BETRAYAL-- A Poem

Trust violated

Circle broken

    Hearts mutilated

      Denial beckoning.

 I feel my idea of us shatter.

In my discombobulated mind,

I hear pieces of my broken heart clatter.

Feeling as worthless as an orange rind.

Memories clearer under the mist of deception

How had I never seen?

I allowed my heart to perform repression;

Blind my eyes in my head since

I accept, I was a fool

I accept, I have been played

I accept, its time to pull away the wool

I accept, I have been betrayed. 

                                 


                                                                   -Eme Umesi A.

                                                             
                                                             

Back To School

Hi guys!
   So.. the party's over, and its time to return to that super busy lifestyle- Late nights with the loving thickly bound textbooks, living on quickly prepared meals, five hours (or less) of sleep- oh the joy!
Anyway, I'll stop whining now. I did after all have a great holiday and I feel well rested and I think I have gained enough weight to have some disposable fat (joke). Well, I know this may sound weird but I am a little  excited about going back to school. New courses mean more interesting stuff to learn about the human body and it also means one semester closer to completing medical school, so its really not a bad deal if you ask me. PLUS, I start visiting the hospital, taking surgery classes (more like watching surgeries)- more work, but exciting (to me anyway).
   I spent the last few days of my two week break just relaxing and being a slob. Eating four times a day, sleeping ten hours a day and drinking a lot of milkshakes. You can't blame me, just recharging my batteries. I did spend about two minutes trying to remember the cause of fatty liver disease from my biochemistry because I'm scared a two week break may have decomposed all my knowledge and then I just decided to enjoy the process while it lasted. It's one of the new things I'm learning to do ''slow down and smell the roses''. You know, be a little patient, enjoy every stage of every thing. Don't be in too much of a rush to do everything. Listen carefully, take your time eating (prevents indigestion), don't talk too fast, don't skip pages while you're reading that book. All that stuff works better when you're not a medical student though or your life isn't too busy, so when you do get time to unwind, soak it all up and enjoy it!.. Savor the moment.
   I hope to still hang out here as much as I can, give you guys the highlights of my week and tell y'all what the hospital is like. I'm looking forward to it. I hope you all are too. Sorry guys, the pictures may be a bit a bit boring today as  I spent most of my time chilling at the mall and stuffing my face with food. P.S I discovered you can also fry bread in butter as opposed to actually frying it. ( I'm probably the last to find out, but allow me bask in my new found knowledge and if you didn't know, then you learned something new! :)). AND, I changed my URL name (is that what it's called?) its now ihundasmusings.blogspot.com :D. Thank you all who drop by to check on my little blog, I really appreciate it, it means a lot to know I'm not writing my thoughts (my very random thoughts) and posting pictures for nothing. And don't be shy to leave comments down below, I'd love to know what you think. Now the pictures (FINALLY!)

One of those incredibly filling breakfasts

The snow hasn't let up still

Camera time is happy time

I was bored, allow me

The one time I went out

Did y'all notice I have braids on? A nice young lady had them done for me.
 Thanks for stopping by. Till Later. Have a fab week! xx